I am severely ill, and am my own task and care manager. It is very hard work. But I live alone and don’t have anyone else to fill those roles. In order to make things work the best I know how, I’ve devoted a lot of time and energy into exploring, trying and iterating systems to make things work as reliably as they can with the least amount of work.
Not all systems work for all people. We all have different kinds of brains. But I’ve worked hard to develop my current system, and I’m sharing in case something in it is useful to someone else.
Quick Jump
My Tools
I use technology heavily to manage my life. I’ve done plenty of things that are analog along the way, and I love putting pen to paper. But for many things it isn’t the most effective for me. There are folks for whom that’s going to work better. Most of my systems are reliant on my Android cell phone, with some use of my Windows laptop.
It’s important to make the technology work for you. There are days I would rather just leave my phone off, and sometimes I do. When it’s on, I use features like do not disturb, turning my ringer to silent, and focus mode with blocked apps to make that more ok.
Apps and software
I was a long time Google user, and pretty knowledgeable of the features, and still use some of their products. But in the interest of digital security, I have been moving away. I don’t really want my data mined, sold, and used for AI development.
Calendar: Proton Calendar
Email: Proton Mail
Volunteer Scheduling: Signup.com
Task management: Todoist.com
Reminders: Reminder
Calendars
I use three calendars that are displayed together. This image shows how it looks in Google Calendar, although I now use Proton Calendar instead. Each calendar has a different purpose, and a different color.
The first is the main calendar that I use to schedule appointments, webinars, events, etc. And is also where I store people’s birthday information. This is always my calendar of record. I may use a paper planner for certain things, or create a hand drawn calendar for planning something complex. But every single thing that matters, always, goes here. Read here if you want to know more about how I do this and what I record.
I suspect I don’t do this much differently than anyone else, with the exception that I also schedule pacing on it. For example, if I have a small event I’m trying to leave the house for, in addition to the event itself, all my rest days before and after will also be blocked off on my calendar. If I have a video call, the rest of the day is blocked, and often the day before and the day after. That way I can’t accidentally schedule more than I can do.
The second calendar is my care schedule. It is set up with a different calendar/mail account, which is what I primarily use to interact with caregivers and candidates. I schedule shifts there. Color coded, and if the caregiver uses an electronic calendar, I can invite them to the events. That way we’re all on the same page.
The third is from an external source that is set up to import and synch twice a day, and that is the schedule for my care volunteers. They are managed through signup.com, and can add and remove themselves from shifts as they need to. By synching that to my calendar I don’t risk missing that something has changed. And I can always log into that calendar directly for real time status if it hasn’t updated yet.
Again, this might sound complicated, but the result appears very simply to me:
Coral are my commitments.
Yellow is my pet care shifts (and where they are missing the shift still needs to be filled).
Green are my care provider shifts.
Tasks
For a long time I managed my lists on paper, and sometimes I still do. But more often I manage them with Todoist.
Todoist has the ability to set up lists called projects. I have two projects, and I manage them entirely separately from each other.
The first is my personal task list (project), currently called “Side Quests” (I’m an only child, I entertain myself). Anything that I need to execute goes on there. Return an email, mail a card, make a doctor’s appointment, find someone to run an errand. It’s on the list.
Todoist is pretty robust in terms of being able to set and change dates, times, recurrence, subtasks, notes, etc. It also allows you to invite another person to join a project and to assign tasks to them. That’s how I handle my second project, Care Tasks.
The second list (project), Care Tasks is in a workspace that can be shared with my caregiver and volunteers helpers. They download a copy of the app and set up an account. I invite them to my project. They can see everything in the project, add things, add notes, check things off as complete, etc. Todoist allows for up to five users to be added to a project on their free plan.
I have recurrent tasks scheduled like empty the dehumidifier every shift, make a grocery list every Monday. I have tasks that are scheduled as recurrent, but I move them sometimes, like changing and washing the bedding. If someone wasn’t able to bring the towels up from the dryer on their shift, they can just add a note to let me know they are still in the dryer. I can plan ahead by scheduling a shower on a certain day with a note that I have a haircut the day after, and set it with a high priority level.
My people enjoy the satisfaction of checking things off! A caregiver can look ahead, and get a sense in advance of what is likely on her plate. And we all appreciate the transparency and knowing we’re on the same page.
Todoist has widgets available for Android. I have one on my front phone home page for my personal task list project, and one on my second page for the care task project. This just helps me see them quickly and easily, and add tasks directly to the right place anytime I think of it. I can always open the full app on my phone or computer.
Reminders
I think of basic life task reminders as a totally different category. These are mostly things that someone with more cognitive capacity, executive function, memory and neurotypical alignment might well just do as a matter of routine, like taking meds. I can’t trust my memory or ability to build habits, so I use an app instead. Some people use their calendar or to do list to manage that. But for me, it just causes too much clutter in those spaces, and increase the likelihood that I’ll lose important things amidst these routinized reminders.
For this I use an Android app called Reminder. It just pops up when it’s time, then goes away when I dismiss it.
It has pretty robust scheduling and recurrence features. And I often get 15-20 reminders a day for things like medicating myself, meditating, turning on and off the alert light I use to let people know when I’m asleep, sending my shopper my grocery list.
The number one key for me is to never, ever dismiss the reminder until I have done the thing. I can sweep it up into the tray if I’m in the middle of something. But the icon is on the top of my screen with the reminder in my pull down until I complete it. There’s also a snooze function for folks who are so inclined. For me, that’s a slippery road towards nothing good.
Scheduled Texts
There’s one other thing that I do to help others help me.
Me: Hey Laura! Could you bring me your spare nut pick on your next shift?
Laura: Sure! Can you remind me?
Me: When would you like that?
Laura: Like 5:00 on Wednesday?
Me: You got it.
And right there and then I type a text to Laura and schedule it for Wednesday at 5.
I know there are folks who don’t have or use text scheduling, but I can’t manage my life without it. It is native in Google Message, and has been available in some Android based texting apps for probably a decade. It is available in Signal, but I’m not aware of it in FB Messenger or WhatsApp.
Another example is if I want to ask someone a question but it’s likely a bad time. Instead of having to remind myself to ask them later, I just write the text and schedule it for a better time.
I also do this with my folks when I know I might be asleep during their shift. If they need to know something or I need them to do something different, I just schedule the text to land 15 minutes or so before I think they will be headed my way.
Snoozed Email
The last task management tool here is the snooze feature in Gmail and Proton Mail. Emails come in that are going to be most relevant at a future date – an annual bill, a membership renewal, a telehealth appointment link, or confirmation for an event six weeks from now. When I see them in my inbox, I just schedule them to go away and come back at a useful time. Then it pops back up at the top of my inbox on the right day and I don’t have to search for it.